I decided that since I have embarked on this journey to lose 100 pds by my birthday 2015 I need to do some cleansing as well. I joined a group of people doing the Green Smoothie Girls 26 day cleanse. Yes, I really said 26 days. As of today I am on day 6 and going strong. It is really amazing what one can do when you put your mind to it. Where our attention goes, energy flows.....that is a saying that I have known for years and the older I get I realize that there is a lot of wisdom in that saying. A lot of truth as well. That being said, I am thriving on this cleanse because I am really focusing on my goal.
It's funny now that things are moving along I am thinking maybe I could extend my goal to 120 pds? Then I sit back and breathe and realize that I need to meet my first goal and then I get the opportunity to set another if I would like to. So to date I have lightened up 26.5 pds since beginning this adventure in March. I'm feeling pretty darn good about my progress. Remember that saying from your childhood that goes something like this....slow and steady wins the race? That is what is bringing me much comfort as I work toward my goal. I know that in order for it to be done the proper way I can't rush things. I can dream about it going quicker though....can't I?
It's funny, my oldest daughter is getting married in August and I hope to be a bit lighter by then, I am seriously focused on my 50th. Why do you suppose that is? Perhaps because I know that I can't possibly reach my goal by August. Wouldn't it be fab if I am halfway there????? Yes! The best part of all of this is that I am getting healthier by the day. As my body is cleansing I feel brighter and happier by the day. The cool thing about this cleanse is that it cleans several systems in our body. Form our Colon, liver and kidneys to our lymphatic and integumentary systems. I love the idea and analogy that I am cleaning my body house much like I clean my house. In fact, today I am tackling a closet. It all just feels so good when it's cleaned and the energy just seems to flow. I love that!
Here's to cleaning!
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
I think it's time!
It had been quite a LONG time since I have written on this blog! I think about it quite a lot and then put it aside and ignore it. Much like I have my body for quite some time now. I thought when I started writing this blog that it would in some small way hold me accountable to myself if I had other reading along. Then I must succeed, right? Well, in theory that sounds great. In reality that is not the way to think.
I have had well over a year go by since I wrote anything at all. I know that writing soothes the soul and is very good for the mind. In some way it allows me to get all of that monkey mind chatter out so that positive creative things can move into its spaces. I have decided that it is time for me to set a new goal! Did you know that if you set a goal and stay focused on it that you are unstoppable? It's true and for one year I am going to make a point of proving that to be true!
I have decided that for my 50th birthday I want to go on a cruise and not just any cruise, it will be a knitting cruise with none other than my new Bestie, Ann Budd! The cruise is to Australia and New Zealand! Can you imagine anything better than this? I certainly can't. So I have set my sights on the prize. Along with the financial goal to meet the expenses for the cruise I will be working on my body. My goal is 100 pds in one year and I started today! I am going to go back to eating raw since that is what works best for me. I will eliminate sugar and gluten. I have a few other ideas up my sleeve too. As for the fiber, I will have to have great restraint so that I can enjoy New Zealand and Australia! So no more purchasing yarn for me!!! I will need every penny for my trip!
I know that when I set my mind to something that I am unstoppable! That is true for all of us. When we have a specific goal in mind then we can attain it. I know that it is not as easy as saying a few words or visualizing for a 5 minutes a day. (although those things do help) It will take perseverance and down right hard work!
I will do my best to keep you posted on this journey to the cruise. Know with me, that everything is unfolding in Divine Right Timing!
Thanks for listening,
Cindy
I have had well over a year go by since I wrote anything at all. I know that writing soothes the soul and is very good for the mind. In some way it allows me to get all of that monkey mind chatter out so that positive creative things can move into its spaces. I have decided that it is time for me to set a new goal! Did you know that if you set a goal and stay focused on it that you are unstoppable? It's true and for one year I am going to make a point of proving that to be true!
I have decided that for my 50th birthday I want to go on a cruise and not just any cruise, it will be a knitting cruise with none other than my new Bestie, Ann Budd! The cruise is to Australia and New Zealand! Can you imagine anything better than this? I certainly can't. So I have set my sights on the prize. Along with the financial goal to meet the expenses for the cruise I will be working on my body. My goal is 100 pds in one year and I started today! I am going to go back to eating raw since that is what works best for me. I will eliminate sugar and gluten. I have a few other ideas up my sleeve too. As for the fiber, I will have to have great restraint so that I can enjoy New Zealand and Australia! So no more purchasing yarn for me!!! I will need every penny for my trip!
I know that when I set my mind to something that I am unstoppable! That is true for all of us. When we have a specific goal in mind then we can attain it. I know that it is not as easy as saying a few words or visualizing for a 5 minutes a day. (although those things do help) It will take perseverance and down right hard work!
I will do my best to keep you posted on this journey to the cruise. Know with me, that everything is unfolding in Divine Right Timing!
Thanks for listening,
Cindy
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Back on the Wagon
It's a dreary fall day here in TX and I am taking this day to do some reflection and some knitting for the upcoming holidays. I so enjoy a day where I can sit and relax with no one needing me to do anything or be anywhere. I have a pot of Veggie soup in the crockpot creating a wonderful fragrance throughout the house. It will make for a wonderful dinner.
I want to share with you a bit of a set back that I have had this week and the awarenesses that I have come to as well. My 19 year old son has decided to move out and go back to Vegas which was home for him most of his life. It is so funny that all our lives are spent training our children and teaching them the "right" things or rather what we think are the right things for them to do only to be upset when they do just that. I guess that I am the one that was not ready for him to move out. After all he is only 19. I mean at 19 I had been out on my own over a year and working two jobs and living in my own apartment. I was also engaged to be married and then married at 20. Looking back now I think to myself-"what was I thinking?" I had no idea what life would have in store for me and he doesn't either. That is what makes life such a great adventure. Maybe that is why I am so sad--because I see so much of myself in him. I grabbed life by the horns and just "went for it". I am really going to miss that young man around here. Or is it that he is my baby boy? The youngest boy. Isn't it funny that he is all moved out and the two older boys 22 and 24 yrs aren't even thinking about moving out? Life is funny
: )
Now that I have explained all of that I need to be clear about my realization and that is that once he called and let me know that he is staying in Vegas to live. I began eating everything in sight for the last four days. I knew in my head that I should stop and yet the hand to mouth action just kept going. I was stuffing, stuffing, stuffing. I was eating carmel corn, candy and cooked food. Nachos, grilled cheese etc. etc. and the list goes on and on. Then this morning when I got on the scale and saw that five (yes I said five) pounds had come on I must admit I was shocked. How could this happen. What takes me weeks to lose even one or two pounds and five come back in four days. How is that even possible? It certainly isn't at all fair. Now I am hoping that this is alot of water weight and today I am doing a complete water fast and not even thinking about food. I made a lovely soup for the family and will drink my water while they eat it in hopes that I will let go of this weight that plummeted back onto my thighs. I recognize that I ate in order to push away the emotions that I was feeling. I really wanted to cry and couldn't let myself do it. I had to be strong, afterall, isn't that what kids are supposed to do? Grow up and move on. I just didn't expect it to be without warning or planning. Now let's be real, in life, how much do we really plan? We try and yet I believe there is some joke about making plans in life and they never turn out as we expect them to. And therein lies the problem---expectations. I have expectations of what something is supposed to be like or turn out like, etc. I need to learn to expect nothing and be surprised and enjoy everything. I definitely had an expectation that the scale would go up and yet the expectation was not that it would have gone up so much. Am I making sense here? I know that I have some more work to do around this issue and I also know that awareness is 90% of the battle. Now that I am aware of what has been feeding my issue this time I can better deal with it.
SO, for today I am back on the wagon so to speak. I am re-focusing and getting clear again and focusing on MY outcome and what MY goal is for my body. Recognizing that it is my responsibility for only myself and not my son or anyone else.
In the knitting department, I am doing pretty great. I have finished the test knit and it is off to the designer. I am almost finished with the back to a sweater that I started last week. Only a few more rows and then I will be casting on for the sleeves or the fronts, I haven't decided which yet. I have not bought any new yarn as of late. I have been dreaming about it though. A friend emailed me this week about a coat kit I had inquired about quite some time ago. I had put it out of my mind for several reasons. One that it is quite expensive and the other that it will take quite a bit of time, maybe years to knit this lovely coat. (lots and I mean lots of intarsia) (7000yds of yarn) UGH! However, the coat is a work of art and one of the most lovely things I have ever seen. Anyway I am actually contemplating it again. I have been reading all of the posts from Rhinebeck and I keep thinking how beautiful I would be walking through Rhinebeck next year wearing this coat sporting my new body. I don't know. I am taking this matter into deep meditation and doing some serious prayer work. Feel free to join me in this matter. I also keep thinking that if I buy this sweater coat yarn, I would have WAY less yarn money for shopping next year and then I think, well, I do have a year to save. I can really find ways to justify this in my head-can't you just hear it in my words that I'm typing? teehee! I am still working toward my goal of getting Christmas knitting done and all of my other projects off the needles for the new year. It's weird to think that I only have two months to do this. I am trudging forward and I know that I am doing my best!!! I will keep you posted on my progress. Is anyone else contemplating my New Year's resolution as well?
More next week on how getting back to raw goes for me. Sending out love and light!
I want to share with you a bit of a set back that I have had this week and the awarenesses that I have come to as well. My 19 year old son has decided to move out and go back to Vegas which was home for him most of his life. It is so funny that all our lives are spent training our children and teaching them the "right" things or rather what we think are the right things for them to do only to be upset when they do just that. I guess that I am the one that was not ready for him to move out. After all he is only 19. I mean at 19 I had been out on my own over a year and working two jobs and living in my own apartment. I was also engaged to be married and then married at 20. Looking back now I think to myself-"what was I thinking?" I had no idea what life would have in store for me and he doesn't either. That is what makes life such a great adventure. Maybe that is why I am so sad--because I see so much of myself in him. I grabbed life by the horns and just "went for it". I am really going to miss that young man around here. Or is it that he is my baby boy? The youngest boy. Isn't it funny that he is all moved out and the two older boys 22 and 24 yrs aren't even thinking about moving out? Life is funny
: )
Now that I have explained all of that I need to be clear about my realization and that is that once he called and let me know that he is staying in Vegas to live. I began eating everything in sight for the last four days. I knew in my head that I should stop and yet the hand to mouth action just kept going. I was stuffing, stuffing, stuffing. I was eating carmel corn, candy and cooked food. Nachos, grilled cheese etc. etc. and the list goes on and on. Then this morning when I got on the scale and saw that five (yes I said five) pounds had come on I must admit I was shocked. How could this happen. What takes me weeks to lose even one or two pounds and five come back in four days. How is that even possible? It certainly isn't at all fair. Now I am hoping that this is alot of water weight and today I am doing a complete water fast and not even thinking about food. I made a lovely soup for the family and will drink my water while they eat it in hopes that I will let go of this weight that plummeted back onto my thighs. I recognize that I ate in order to push away the emotions that I was feeling. I really wanted to cry and couldn't let myself do it. I had to be strong, afterall, isn't that what kids are supposed to do? Grow up and move on. I just didn't expect it to be without warning or planning. Now let's be real, in life, how much do we really plan? We try and yet I believe there is some joke about making plans in life and they never turn out as we expect them to. And therein lies the problem---expectations. I have expectations of what something is supposed to be like or turn out like, etc. I need to learn to expect nothing and be surprised and enjoy everything. I definitely had an expectation that the scale would go up and yet the expectation was not that it would have gone up so much. Am I making sense here? I know that I have some more work to do around this issue and I also know that awareness is 90% of the battle. Now that I am aware of what has been feeding my issue this time I can better deal with it.
SO, for today I am back on the wagon so to speak. I am re-focusing and getting clear again and focusing on MY outcome and what MY goal is for my body. Recognizing that it is my responsibility for only myself and not my son or anyone else.
In the knitting department, I am doing pretty great. I have finished the test knit and it is off to the designer. I am almost finished with the back to a sweater that I started last week. Only a few more rows and then I will be casting on for the sleeves or the fronts, I haven't decided which yet. I have not bought any new yarn as of late. I have been dreaming about it though. A friend emailed me this week about a coat kit I had inquired about quite some time ago. I had put it out of my mind for several reasons. One that it is quite expensive and the other that it will take quite a bit of time, maybe years to knit this lovely coat. (lots and I mean lots of intarsia) (7000yds of yarn) UGH! However, the coat is a work of art and one of the most lovely things I have ever seen. Anyway I am actually contemplating it again. I have been reading all of the posts from Rhinebeck and I keep thinking how beautiful I would be walking through Rhinebeck next year wearing this coat sporting my new body. I don't know. I am taking this matter into deep meditation and doing some serious prayer work. Feel free to join me in this matter. I also keep thinking that if I buy this sweater coat yarn, I would have WAY less yarn money for shopping next year and then I think, well, I do have a year to save. I can really find ways to justify this in my head-can't you just hear it in my words that I'm typing? teehee! I am still working toward my goal of getting Christmas knitting done and all of my other projects off the needles for the new year. It's weird to think that I only have two months to do this. I am trudging forward and I know that I am doing my best!!! I will keep you posted on my progress. Is anyone else contemplating my New Year's resolution as well?
More next week on how getting back to raw goes for me. Sending out love and light!
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Confessions of a Yarnaholic
Well here I am a couple of weeks since the last post and I am pleased to report in that I am officially down 25 pounds!!! Yes, I did say 25 pounds. I hit the 25 pound mark on this past Sunday. That being said I now have 98.5 pds til my goal. I have continued to juice for two meals and then for the third I am either eating raw or doing a raw soup in the Vitamix. I feel great!!! Bonus from eating Raw is that I feel more clear. I actually have been going through some emotional highs and lows though too. There are times when I feel like the flood gates are about to open and the tears start and then I have moments of pure elation and joy. I imagine that this is continuing to be part of the detox portion of the food changes. I know that in the ebook Raw Emotions that Angela speaks about the emotional detoxing lasting for quite a few months. And in fact, I think she actually said that it didn't start right away. It was about 2 to 3 months into the change of eating that it started for her. I definitely feel some of my feelings of loss from the move surfacing as well. I think about my friends and the relationships that I had in KY a lot. I really miss my friends there. They were so awesome and so supportive. It's funny but I have also been focusing on my spirituality quite a bit as well. I find that there is a part of me yearning to be expressed spiritually as well. I have been spending more time in the silence and in meditation. For me, sometimes I fight going through the emotions thinking I should do it later when I have more time to deal with it. What I am noticing though is that if I spend a little time with the emotion and check in and see where it's root is I can actually work through it and get to the other side. For now that is working. I wonder if as I go deeper and deeper into detox if it will get harder because I can only guess what some of these buried emotions that I have stuffed might be. Time will tell and I won't rush it. My body will heal at it's own pace one day at a time.
One interesting thought that I just had is that while the weight is lightening up I have "cheated" on the fiber fast. Hmmmmm, what do you suppose that is all about? This past weekend was the annual Best Little Yarn Crawl in TX. It was a four day crawl around to 10 yarn stores in the Austin/ San Antonio area. What fun it was. It was my first yarn crawl ever. I worked at the shop where I teach for two of the days and then the other two days I did the crawl. I made it to all 10 stores and I am planning on the winning the big prize of a $500 gift certificate. WooHoo. While on my journey to these 10 stores I succumbed to the temptation, I blew it! I am a true yarn a holic! I purchased a couple of things, I broke the fast. In my defense they were things that I had never seen before and can not get at my local yarn shop. I know that is not really justification for breaking my fast but it's the best I can do. I thought that I could wrap it and put it under the Christmas tree from my family. That is just another way for me to justify it though, isn't it? The crawl was quite an experience. You get in your car and you strategically plan your route. One day I went north and the last day I went south. Super fun! I went by myself because I didn't really know anyone to go with. I can tell you that it would be a blast with a group of girlfriends and I hope that next year I will have someone to go with. For now I am back on the fasting wagon. I have to tell you that it has been an interesting journey this fall. I am doing a test knit that is taking me a fair bit of time. More than usual. Not because it is hard but because it is tedious and has patterning on both sides and tons of cables. It is gorgeous though! Can't wait until the designer reveals it. Last week I took a break to knit a shawl for the yarn crawl for the shop to use as a display model and I finished it in 8 days, which made me feel accomplished and now I am back to the test knit. As soon as the test knit is finished I will get back to Christmas knitting and cleaning off my needles for 12/31/12 so that I can start the new year off clean. I am so excited about that!!!
I trust that your Fall is bring much beauty and joy to your life as the seasons begin to change. I'll be in touch soon!
One interesting thought that I just had is that while the weight is lightening up I have "cheated" on the fiber fast. Hmmmmm, what do you suppose that is all about? This past weekend was the annual Best Little Yarn Crawl in TX. It was a four day crawl around to 10 yarn stores in the Austin/ San Antonio area. What fun it was. It was my first yarn crawl ever. I worked at the shop where I teach for two of the days and then the other two days I did the crawl. I made it to all 10 stores and I am planning on the winning the big prize of a $500 gift certificate. WooHoo. While on my journey to these 10 stores I succumbed to the temptation, I blew it! I am a true yarn a holic! I purchased a couple of things, I broke the fast. In my defense they were things that I had never seen before and can not get at my local yarn shop. I know that is not really justification for breaking my fast but it's the best I can do. I thought that I could wrap it and put it under the Christmas tree from my family. That is just another way for me to justify it though, isn't it? The crawl was quite an experience. You get in your car and you strategically plan your route. One day I went north and the last day I went south. Super fun! I went by myself because I didn't really know anyone to go with. I can tell you that it would be a blast with a group of girlfriends and I hope that next year I will have someone to go with. For now I am back on the fasting wagon. I have to tell you that it has been an interesting journey this fall. I am doing a test knit that is taking me a fair bit of time. More than usual. Not because it is hard but because it is tedious and has patterning on both sides and tons of cables. It is gorgeous though! Can't wait until the designer reveals it. Last week I took a break to knit a shawl for the yarn crawl for the shop to use as a display model and I finished it in 8 days, which made me feel accomplished and now I am back to the test knit. As soon as the test knit is finished I will get back to Christmas knitting and cleaning off my needles for 12/31/12 so that I can start the new year off clean. I am so excited about that!!!
I trust that your Fall is bring much beauty and joy to your life as the seasons begin to change. I'll be in touch soon!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Conscious Awareness
I have been meaning to get to this blog for over a week now. I never know how often is an appropriate amount of time to go in between blogs. I guess I think there should be some magic formula to follow. Since it is early morning here in TX and my thoughts are about what has been going on with my body it must be the appropriate time to blog. Today is day 12 of juicing. Yes, I took the plunge and began juicing after I got back and got settled from my trip to KY. I am officially 16 pounds closer to my goal. Speaking of goals I did some re-evaluating about my goal. This is what I was thinking. I really have a set goal weight that I ultimately am choosing to weigh and it is a little more than the 100 pounds that originally set out to lighten up. It is actually 123.5 pds that I am intending to lighten up and so I have decided to embrace the final goal rather than 100 pds I am going for the full 123.5. Whoohoo--Yay me. If I look at it percentage wise I have already lightened up a little over 10%. How cool is that?
After my friend left nearly two weeks ago I joined a group that Tera Warner has on emotional eating and cravings. I read Angela Stokes Monarchs book called Raw emotions from cover to cover in a day and a half. It was very eye opening for me to read someone elses journey and see how similar our patterns are. This book was part of Tera program. Included in the program are various other reading materials and audio clips to listen to, teleseminars and conference calls re: emotional eating. I learned so much from them and will continue to replay them and re-read the books and booklets as well.
It's funny going back to juicing which I have done for about 2 weeks one other time in my life, all you do is drink. All day long. Juice, water, juice, water and of course go to the bathroom a lot too. : )
I am getting close to the two week mark and I am not sure how long I will stay on the juice. Everyday I think, will this be the day? I am just waiting for my body to tell me. Some days I feel like I am hungry and then I drink and I am fine. It's funny, for so many years I just ate my way through my days. I never truly knew whether I was hungry or not. I ate out of habit, I ate out of fear and I ate when I was happy, I ate when I was sad. Any excuse and I was eating. The whole time I was unconsciously doing that I was covering up things that I didn't really want to look at. Emotions that I didn't really want to feel. Now I am focusing on conscious eating and really paying attention to how I FEEL while I am eating instead of just doing the whole hand to mouth action out of habit. I intend to transition to completely raw food once the juice fast is over. I know that I feel best when I am putting live foods into my body. The cool thing is that I can already see a difference in my skin. I can tell on my forehead that my digestion is already returning to balance and the congestion between the eyes is smoothing out. I love that! I love how our body gives us clues as to how it is doing if only we pay attention to what it wants. For so long I have not paid attention and while it does no one any good to dwell on the past--I am sorry that I have neglected my body for so long. Neglecting my body has had consequences. I had to have my gall bladder removed in Jan of this year. That was a sign of toxicity built up inside. Appendicitis is also another sign that toxins are built up in our bodies. Most of the symptoms we have when our bodies are out of balance are just a way of our body telling us that we are out of balance and that it's time to do something about it. Do we really listen to our bodies or do we find a way to cover up the symptoms by taking another pill or potion? I think that our bodies are amazing and if we treat them just a little kinder they will continue to support us in this wonderful lifetime.
I have been knitting a test knit for a designer and the project is a wonderful wrap. This particular project has taken me far longer than I intended. It is full of wonderful patterns and cables which accounts for the extra time it has taken to knit it. I have been working hard on it as I have been juicing and I have thought that when I finally finish my test knit maybe I would end my juicing as well. It would be symbolic of finishing something and moving on to a new thing. I know that sounds kinda goofy. I had a goal to have it finished by this weekend and due to Olympic knitting and a trip back to KY my deadline is not going to be met. I figure that I have about 25 hours of knitting, at least, left to go. It keeps going on and on. That figures out to be quite a number of days left to work on it depending on the other things going on in my life and when I can get a few minutes to sit down and knit on it. I don't know if I will continue to juice that long or not--time will tell. I'll keep you posted. Once I finish this project I have a shawl to knit for the shawl exchange and then I am back to my plan of getting everything off my needles by Dec. 31 so I can start the new year off with a new project. I went over my lists yesterday and looked at all of the wonderful projects I have in my stash to knit and I have to say that it is sooooo super exciting to think of starting something new. I do have a few things that I have promised to knit for other people as well and I am excited that I will finally get to start on them as well. Yippee!
I still spend my fair share of time on the internet cruising Ravelry and all of my other favorite fiber sites such as Briar Rose, Miss Babs, Skeins ( have you seen their top drawer sock? AMAZING) and Fiber Optic and I am dreaming of new yarns to try and new patterns to add to my queue. I love dreaming and imagining because it stretches me. It allows me to look at things in a new way and see the possibilities that I might never have thought of before. During all of my exploring I look at the Rhinebeck site and I see all of the wonderful things that will be happening this year and I can't wait for next year!!! I am so excited within myself and I keep thinking of how I might win the lottery and then I could go this year. Doesn't that sound like a plan? I keep buying my lottery tickets : ) I know that knitting my stash down will allow and create more space for new to come in and that, too, is exciting. So unless the lottery comes through I will continue to wait for next year and I will know that Rhinebeck will wait for me and it will be even more wonderful than I imagined.
I will continue to take each day as it comes and remain as conscious as possible about my body and my stash and for today that's all I have. I will keep you posted and let you know how it goes.
After my friend left nearly two weeks ago I joined a group that Tera Warner has on emotional eating and cravings. I read Angela Stokes Monarchs book called Raw emotions from cover to cover in a day and a half. It was very eye opening for me to read someone elses journey and see how similar our patterns are. This book was part of Tera program. Included in the program are various other reading materials and audio clips to listen to, teleseminars and conference calls re: emotional eating. I learned so much from them and will continue to replay them and re-read the books and booklets as well.
It's funny going back to juicing which I have done for about 2 weeks one other time in my life, all you do is drink. All day long. Juice, water, juice, water and of course go to the bathroom a lot too. : )
I am getting close to the two week mark and I am not sure how long I will stay on the juice. Everyday I think, will this be the day? I am just waiting for my body to tell me. Some days I feel like I am hungry and then I drink and I am fine. It's funny, for so many years I just ate my way through my days. I never truly knew whether I was hungry or not. I ate out of habit, I ate out of fear and I ate when I was happy, I ate when I was sad. Any excuse and I was eating. The whole time I was unconsciously doing that I was covering up things that I didn't really want to look at. Emotions that I didn't really want to feel. Now I am focusing on conscious eating and really paying attention to how I FEEL while I am eating instead of just doing the whole hand to mouth action out of habit. I intend to transition to completely raw food once the juice fast is over. I know that I feel best when I am putting live foods into my body. The cool thing is that I can already see a difference in my skin. I can tell on my forehead that my digestion is already returning to balance and the congestion between the eyes is smoothing out. I love that! I love how our body gives us clues as to how it is doing if only we pay attention to what it wants. For so long I have not paid attention and while it does no one any good to dwell on the past--I am sorry that I have neglected my body for so long. Neglecting my body has had consequences. I had to have my gall bladder removed in Jan of this year. That was a sign of toxicity built up inside. Appendicitis is also another sign that toxins are built up in our bodies. Most of the symptoms we have when our bodies are out of balance are just a way of our body telling us that we are out of balance and that it's time to do something about it. Do we really listen to our bodies or do we find a way to cover up the symptoms by taking another pill or potion? I think that our bodies are amazing and if we treat them just a little kinder they will continue to support us in this wonderful lifetime.
I have been knitting a test knit for a designer and the project is a wonderful wrap. This particular project has taken me far longer than I intended. It is full of wonderful patterns and cables which accounts for the extra time it has taken to knit it. I have been working hard on it as I have been juicing and I have thought that when I finally finish my test knit maybe I would end my juicing as well. It would be symbolic of finishing something and moving on to a new thing. I know that sounds kinda goofy. I had a goal to have it finished by this weekend and due to Olympic knitting and a trip back to KY my deadline is not going to be met. I figure that I have about 25 hours of knitting, at least, left to go. It keeps going on and on. That figures out to be quite a number of days left to work on it depending on the other things going on in my life and when I can get a few minutes to sit down and knit on it. I don't know if I will continue to juice that long or not--time will tell. I'll keep you posted. Once I finish this project I have a shawl to knit for the shawl exchange and then I am back to my plan of getting everything off my needles by Dec. 31 so I can start the new year off with a new project. I went over my lists yesterday and looked at all of the wonderful projects I have in my stash to knit and I have to say that it is sooooo super exciting to think of starting something new. I do have a few things that I have promised to knit for other people as well and I am excited that I will finally get to start on them as well. Yippee!
I still spend my fair share of time on the internet cruising Ravelry and all of my other favorite fiber sites such as Briar Rose, Miss Babs, Skeins ( have you seen their top drawer sock? AMAZING) and Fiber Optic and I am dreaming of new yarns to try and new patterns to add to my queue. I love dreaming and imagining because it stretches me. It allows me to look at things in a new way and see the possibilities that I might never have thought of before. During all of my exploring I look at the Rhinebeck site and I see all of the wonderful things that will be happening this year and I can't wait for next year!!! I am so excited within myself and I keep thinking of how I might win the lottery and then I could go this year. Doesn't that sound like a plan? I keep buying my lottery tickets : ) I know that knitting my stash down will allow and create more space for new to come in and that, too, is exciting. So unless the lottery comes through I will continue to wait for next year and I will know that Rhinebeck will wait for me and it will be even more wonderful than I imagined.
I will continue to take each day as it comes and remain as conscious as possible about my body and my stash and for today that's all I have. I will keep you posted and let you know how it goes.
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Do Over's
Well here I am in Sept. and I think about all of the time that has passed since my last blog, one month I think and I realize that it's time for a "do-over". As a parent I have given my children many chances to have do overs, and now I think that it is time for me to give one to myself. So if you can all handle it I am going to do a "do-over"
I have only managed to keep 1 and 1/2 pounds off from my last post over a month ago. So right there that tells you that I have not stuck to my eating regimen. In fact, I have taken carte blanche to eat whatever I have wanted to and I justified it by saying I am moving again and by moving again I had to move my son here to TX from KY. For me that meant flying to KY and getting the car ready and then driving back to TX. We all know that it is never as easy to stay on target when you are eating out all of the time and are at different peoples houses.
While in KY I went to North Carolina to the Unique Sheep retreat and had an absolute blast!!! I am already looking forward to returning to the retreat next year. Merike Saarniit was our knitting teacher and she was amazing and I learned so many new things!!! She is teaching on a cruise to the Baltic Sea next August and I am dreaming about how I can be a student on her cruise. Maybe if I just teach a few more classes and get another job I can swing it financially. What do you think? Not only is Merike teaching but Anna Zilboorg is also teaching too. What a dynamic duo!!!! I must find a way to go, that's all there is to it! Perhaps it could be a gift to myself when I meet my goal? Hmmmm that is a thought, and definitely a wonderful incentive to reach my goal.
I must tell you about my fiber fast and let you know how it's going. I picked up some yarns that I had ordered from my LYS in KY before the fast started and they came in and the shop held them for me until I returned. There were 4 skeins. One is for my daughter to knit her a pair of socks for Christmas and the other 3 are for a shawl. The colors are beautiful, they are from three irish girls, so of course they are lovely. And I must just say that the only thing I purchased from the retreat was one set of pima cotton to go with the another set that I already have from the smell the roses club that I belong to. I can make a larger shawl with the yarn by adding both sets together. Merike, who designed the shawl was wearing her shawl at the retreat and she had made it bigger for herself and I loved it and thought that I would love to make my shawl bigger like hers so as luck would have it Kelly had an extra set of the pima cotton and I was able to score it and now I will have an amazing shawl like Merikes. I know that technically that was breaking the fast and yet you have to tell me that you would have made the same choice that I did. Plus I do just have to tell you that my fiber fast buddy has been way worse than me. She has "caved" several times so I don't feel too guilty. So I guess it's time for a "do-over" for the fiber fast as well.
Today I went to the outlet malls in San Marcos to do some shopping with my friend and my daughter. My daughters birthday is coming up soon and I wanted to get some ideas for her gifts. I guess I am in somewhat of a contemplative mood today, and I just have to say that as I sat on a bench waiting for my daughter to come out of a store I was people watching. I tend to do that when I am just waiting. I often times wonder about the people that I am watching. I wonder about their lives, what they do, where they live and what kinds of hopes and dreams they have. I imagine them to have lives very similar to mine. I also must confess that I look at the womens bodies and I wonder if they are happy with them. I look at thin women and overweight women as well. I know some overweight women who are very happy with their weight and then I know some very thin women who are very unhappy with their bodies. I honestly believe that we all have our own challenges and what I think about myself is all that really matters. It doesn't really work to compare myself to someone else or wish I were someone else, because in reality I might be way unhappier in their skin. Why is it that we judge others by looks? I know that I am just as guilty as the next person for looking at a person and judging them. It is not for me to judge anyone and yet I think it is human nature to do that. I have decided that every time I catch myself judging either someone else, or myself I will stop and send a blessing instead. I think that it is important for each of us to become a better observer of our thoughts. My goal for this coming week is to become a better observer of my thoughts. I challenge all of you reading to do the same and when observing, offer compassion and love instead of judgement.
I have learned along the way during this life, that when we give up something in our lives that we no longer desire, it is important to take on something that we do desire. As I let go of the judgement about my body, I am choosing to take on loving affirmations about my body. After all, it is the only body that I have.
I have only managed to keep 1 and 1/2 pounds off from my last post over a month ago. So right there that tells you that I have not stuck to my eating regimen. In fact, I have taken carte blanche to eat whatever I have wanted to and I justified it by saying I am moving again and by moving again I had to move my son here to TX from KY. For me that meant flying to KY and getting the car ready and then driving back to TX. We all know that it is never as easy to stay on target when you are eating out all of the time and are at different peoples houses.
While in KY I went to North Carolina to the Unique Sheep retreat and had an absolute blast!!! I am already looking forward to returning to the retreat next year. Merike Saarniit was our knitting teacher and she was amazing and I learned so many new things!!! She is teaching on a cruise to the Baltic Sea next August and I am dreaming about how I can be a student on her cruise. Maybe if I just teach a few more classes and get another job I can swing it financially. What do you think? Not only is Merike teaching but Anna Zilboorg is also teaching too. What a dynamic duo!!!! I must find a way to go, that's all there is to it! Perhaps it could be a gift to myself when I meet my goal? Hmmmm that is a thought, and definitely a wonderful incentive to reach my goal.
I must tell you about my fiber fast and let you know how it's going. I picked up some yarns that I had ordered from my LYS in KY before the fast started and they came in and the shop held them for me until I returned. There were 4 skeins. One is for my daughter to knit her a pair of socks for Christmas and the other 3 are for a shawl. The colors are beautiful, they are from three irish girls, so of course they are lovely. And I must just say that the only thing I purchased from the retreat was one set of pima cotton to go with the another set that I already have from the smell the roses club that I belong to. I can make a larger shawl with the yarn by adding both sets together. Merike, who designed the shawl was wearing her shawl at the retreat and she had made it bigger for herself and I loved it and thought that I would love to make my shawl bigger like hers so as luck would have it Kelly had an extra set of the pima cotton and I was able to score it and now I will have an amazing shawl like Merikes. I know that technically that was breaking the fast and yet you have to tell me that you would have made the same choice that I did. Plus I do just have to tell you that my fiber fast buddy has been way worse than me. She has "caved" several times so I don't feel too guilty. So I guess it's time for a "do-over" for the fiber fast as well.
Today I went to the outlet malls in San Marcos to do some shopping with my friend and my daughter. My daughters birthday is coming up soon and I wanted to get some ideas for her gifts. I guess I am in somewhat of a contemplative mood today, and I just have to say that as I sat on a bench waiting for my daughter to come out of a store I was people watching. I tend to do that when I am just waiting. I often times wonder about the people that I am watching. I wonder about their lives, what they do, where they live and what kinds of hopes and dreams they have. I imagine them to have lives very similar to mine. I also must confess that I look at the womens bodies and I wonder if they are happy with them. I look at thin women and overweight women as well. I know some overweight women who are very happy with their weight and then I know some very thin women who are very unhappy with their bodies. I honestly believe that we all have our own challenges and what I think about myself is all that really matters. It doesn't really work to compare myself to someone else or wish I were someone else, because in reality I might be way unhappier in their skin. Why is it that we judge others by looks? I know that I am just as guilty as the next person for looking at a person and judging them. It is not for me to judge anyone and yet I think it is human nature to do that. I have decided that every time I catch myself judging either someone else, or myself I will stop and send a blessing instead. I think that it is important for each of us to become a better observer of our thoughts. My goal for this coming week is to become a better observer of my thoughts. I challenge all of you reading to do the same and when observing, offer compassion and love instead of judgement.
I have learned along the way during this life, that when we give up something in our lives that we no longer desire, it is important to take on something that we do desire. As I let go of the judgement about my body, I am choosing to take on loving affirmations about my body. After all, it is the only body that I have.
Monday, July 30, 2012
In the "Groove"
Well I am happy to report that I am back in the groove. Life is starting to settle down. The house is as put together as it can be for now.
This past weekend marked the beginning of the Olympics. I marked the beginning of the Olympics with a party at my new LYS. They held a cast-on party for the Ravellenic games. I cast on for Team Briar Rose . I cast on Pea Vines Shawl by Anne Hanson. 379 stitches--woohoo. Let me just say that it takes a minute to knit one row. After knitting 2 days I finally feel like I am making some progress. I am also happy to report that I am holding steady on my fiber fast. Yay! It is amazing to me what the Olympics bring out in people. I watch and I feel the energy of everyone cheering on team USA and not even our country, all countries come together in a spirit of cheering everyone to do their best. I also think that the Olympics being held in London bring a majestic feel to this particular Olympic games. Isn't the Queen wonderful? I love her sense of humor and how she stepped out of her "box" to bring a whole new element to the Olympics. I love watching and knitting every day and I enjoy the camaraderie that it brings to my ravelry team as well. Go team brf 2012!!!
I am also happy to report that I have held steadfast to a healthy eating plan and this week I have lightened up 6 pounds. I know that is a lot to lighten up in only one week and yet remember it's the first week, and as we all know that any time we go on a live-it the first week or so we usually lighten up more than most.
63 weeks til Rhinebeck!!! I know it is so far away and yet I am super excited. I keep visualizing myself in a beautiful long cardigan that will keep me snuggly warm as I walk around all of the tents and vendors. It's a way smaller size than I normally knit. : ) I have a pair of felted mittens on my hand and a lovely knitted head band keeping my ears warm. Don't I look cute? In my mind it's cute. Now I just have to determine the yarns and colors to knit. In my mind I see me wearing a new Kaffe Fassett coat--yummy. Way too much work to get to before next October. I knit one of his coats over 20 years ago and it took me FOREVER! It was however, the most beautiful coat I have ever made. Well, there is my Prism coat--hmmm, What can I say, I think they are all beautiful! It is fun to dream about next year. It's the same way when you are planning a vacation. You think about it, plan it, and dream about it for weeks and even months and then before you know it--it's here. Let's hope Rhinebeck comes as quick.
I have been thinking about what has caused me to self sabotage in the past. It has been many different things from feeling unloved to being depressed to no confidence and the list could go on and on. What I realize is that different things are triggers for me. This week I noticed that I wanted to eat less healthy things when I was happy and having a good day. Isn't that odd? Perhaps not, as we tend to eat surrounding celebrations and if you have noticed in your own life that so many of our times together with others are centered around food. I wonder why that is? Food can be that thing that causes a bit of disconnect when we are with others. If you think about it, food can bring us together and then when the meal is over, that is our chance to dis-connect with the other person. Food offers excuses on many levels. I also noticed that when I was frustrated I thought some chips would help. I didn't eat them though. I was definitely being the observer this past week. I avoided all sugary substances this week and I can tell that I was irritable at times and yet overall I feel pretty good. I think that it will take a few weeks for the sugar to get completely out of my system. I will continue to contemplate the issues surrounding my food intake. For now I have my vitamix out and I am back to my green smoothies every morning and eating as close to raw as possible. I am eating a few cooked items as well and in very small quantities.
For the coming week I plan to stay on task. I will continue my self sabotage class and keep you posted.
Happy Knitting, Eating and watching the Olympics!
This past weekend marked the beginning of the Olympics. I marked the beginning of the Olympics with a party at my new LYS. They held a cast-on party for the Ravellenic games. I cast on for Team Briar Rose . I cast on Pea Vines Shawl by Anne Hanson. 379 stitches--woohoo. Let me just say that it takes a minute to knit one row. After knitting 2 days I finally feel like I am making some progress. I am also happy to report that I am holding steady on my fiber fast. Yay! It is amazing to me what the Olympics bring out in people. I watch and I feel the energy of everyone cheering on team USA and not even our country, all countries come together in a spirit of cheering everyone to do their best. I also think that the Olympics being held in London bring a majestic feel to this particular Olympic games. Isn't the Queen wonderful? I love her sense of humor and how she stepped out of her "box" to bring a whole new element to the Olympics. I love watching and knitting every day and I enjoy the camaraderie that it brings to my ravelry team as well. Go team brf 2012!!!
I am also happy to report that I have held steadfast to a healthy eating plan and this week I have lightened up 6 pounds. I know that is a lot to lighten up in only one week and yet remember it's the first week, and as we all know that any time we go on a live-it the first week or so we usually lighten up more than most.
63 weeks til Rhinebeck!!! I know it is so far away and yet I am super excited. I keep visualizing myself in a beautiful long cardigan that will keep me snuggly warm as I walk around all of the tents and vendors. It's a way smaller size than I normally knit. : ) I have a pair of felted mittens on my hand and a lovely knitted head band keeping my ears warm. Don't I look cute? In my mind it's cute. Now I just have to determine the yarns and colors to knit. In my mind I see me wearing a new Kaffe Fassett coat--yummy. Way too much work to get to before next October. I knit one of his coats over 20 years ago and it took me FOREVER! It was however, the most beautiful coat I have ever made. Well, there is my Prism coat--hmmm, What can I say, I think they are all beautiful! It is fun to dream about next year. It's the same way when you are planning a vacation. You think about it, plan it, and dream about it for weeks and even months and then before you know it--it's here. Let's hope Rhinebeck comes as quick.
I have been thinking about what has caused me to self sabotage in the past. It has been many different things from feeling unloved to being depressed to no confidence and the list could go on and on. What I realize is that different things are triggers for me. This week I noticed that I wanted to eat less healthy things when I was happy and having a good day. Isn't that odd? Perhaps not, as we tend to eat surrounding celebrations and if you have noticed in your own life that so many of our times together with others are centered around food. I wonder why that is? Food can be that thing that causes a bit of disconnect when we are with others. If you think about it, food can bring us together and then when the meal is over, that is our chance to dis-connect with the other person. Food offers excuses on many levels. I also noticed that when I was frustrated I thought some chips would help. I didn't eat them though. I was definitely being the observer this past week. I avoided all sugary substances this week and I can tell that I was irritable at times and yet overall I feel pretty good. I think that it will take a few weeks for the sugar to get completely out of my system. I will continue to contemplate the issues surrounding my food intake. For now I have my vitamix out and I am back to my green smoothies every morning and eating as close to raw as possible. I am eating a few cooked items as well and in very small quantities.
For the coming week I plan to stay on task. I will continue my self sabotage class and keep you posted.
Happy Knitting, Eating and watching the Olympics!
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